DRY CLOTHES MICROWAVE https://blog.dnevnik.hr/dry-clothes-microwave

Norpro Stainless Steel Vertical Roaster, With Infuser

Infuse your chicken with intriguing flavors using this vertical roaster. It will be the most flavorful and moist chicken you've ever had! Made of quality stainless steel, this roaster begins with a vertical roasting stand that attaches to a large, round drip tray (the stand collapses for easy storage). In the center of the drip tray sits a round dish with cone shaped top. Fill the round dish with herbs, spices, cider, juices or beer; as your chicken rests on the stand, the aromas and flavors from the liquids and herbs pass through the perforations on the cone shaped top, filling the cavity of the bird and adding moisture to the meat as it roasts. Instructions on using the vertical roaster are included.

If your last experiment with a vertical roaster led to the bird tipping on its tripod base and landing in the grease pouring out of its cavity, here's a chance to get it right. This Norpro model is versatile enough to serve as a horizontal 13-by-8-1/2-inch rack for roasts. And it easily but sturdily converts to vertical roasting by anchoring up to four hooked pieces to the slats of the flat rack, enabling two birds to roast on this roost, cooking evenly inside and out, with no danger of capon cartwheel. Flipping the bird, so to speak, is a thing of the past--there's no need to pull the rack out of the oven halfway through cooking--and you may as well roast two while you have the heat cranked up (put one in the freezer for next week). Cleanup is fairly easy, too; just be sure to use a nonabrasive sponge or squeegee to preserve the nonstick coating. --Tony Mason

Bacon and Potato Salad

Ingredients
5 eggs
4 slices bacon
2 tablespoons Dijon mustard, or to taste
1 cup mayonnaise
3 stalks celery, minced
2 pounds small potatoes
2 tablespoons chopped fresh parsley
salt and pepper to taste
Directions
1.Place the potatoes in a pot with enough water to cover, and bring to a boil. Cook for about 20 minutes, or until tender. Drain and cool.
2.Meanwhile, place eggs in a saucepan and cover with cold water. Bring water to a boil and immediately remove from heat. Cover, and let eggs stand in hot water for 10 to 12 minutes. Remove from hot water, and place in a bowl of cold water to cool.
3.Peel the eggs, and place 3 of them into a large bowl. Reserve the rest for later. Mash the eggs in the bowl with a fork. Stir in the mustard, mayonnaise, celery, salt and pepper. Set aside.
4.Cook bacon slices in the microwave for about 4 minutes, until crisp, or fry in a skillet over medium-high heat. Crumble 2 of the bacon slices into the mayonnaise mixture. Reserve the rest for garnish.
5.Peel and chop the potatoes, and stir into the bowl until evenly coated. Slice the 2 remaining eggs, and place on top of the salad. Crumble the remaining bacon over the eggs, then sprinkle parsley over the top.

photo by brookage

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ingredients:
1 magenta bikini w/skirt (chest jazz optional)
2 packages of turkey bacon
1 can spray shellac
1 roll of packing tape

you will also need:
microwave (1)
paper towels (1 roll)
newspaper (some)
porch / drying station (1)
paleness
a partner (for the back)

microwave bacon, 8 strips at a time. allow to dry on paper towels. when all bacon has been cooked, spread out strips individually on newspaper (at your drying station). coat each strip as much as possible with shellac. allow to dry overnight.

realize that hot glue will not make semi-cooked meat stick to cheap cloth; cover entire front of bikini with one layer of packing tape. individually place and tape each piece of bacon on the now plastic parts of your bikini. when finished, add one more layer of packing tape horizontally to seal your fate.

once you arrive at your destination (baconfest), have a buddy (thanks evel) tape the back of your bikini. tuck in all sharp parts. repeat process on the back: tape bacon-at-a-time; seal.

now you can't sit down, so don't. avoid carnivorous animals at all costs.

put on extra sunscreen, since you're cooking...literally. boob burns hurt!

when the fun is done, throw remnants in dumpster.

We have put together the only such DVD compilation in the world on turkey and poultry industry education films. We have some of the rarest and finest films from 1930-1970 on this subject. You can't find this DVD anywhere else. Running time 67 minutes. TABLE OF CONTENTS: Let's Talk Turkey (1960s) - 22 minutes running time - In the 1960s, more and more grocery stores started to carry whole turkey, so the American consumer was no longer restricted to the butcher shop. (Which also means they no longer had to chop off the head and feet too!) This film shows how to properly dress and roast a turkey, along with various other recipes and culinary techniques. A Day of Thanksgiving (1951) - 13 minutes running time - A middle-lower class American family can't afford a turkey for Thanksgiving, but they discover that wealth would not lead them to any greater happiness and they should all be very thankful (after all, it is Thanksgiving Day) for all the great things they DO have in their life. This movie actually won some film awards in the early 1950s. Poultry on the Farm (1937) - 11 minutes running time - Turkeys, chickens, geese, ducks and all types of other poultry are discussed at length. This film includes great footage of incubation machinery and embryo hatchings. Carving Magic (1960s) - 21 minutes running time - Wow - this film shows how to properly cut almost any type of meat using the correct knives and utensils. Turkey, steaks, chicken, lamb, etc. This is an excellent film with tons of useful information and brilliant color photography.

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